Change is a good thing.

I need a change.

I feel like life has been living for me, but I haven't really been living my life.
Does that even make sense? It's like this, I get up every single day and do things in order of importance that I have to do for that particular day and then that is it. I think it's mainly because I know my days of "academic prison" are short and numbered and it won't be long before I'm in the real world, making my own decisions about what I want to do with my life. No more of this set schedule of courses I'm supposed to have completed by certain dates, deadlines for papers and projects, test dates. None of it. I will have complete freedom of what I do with my life and all the decisions I make.

Sounds wonderful doesn't it. Nope, not exactly for me!
I'm scared to death. Hence the reason I've been blogging oh so much about this dreaded "doomsday" they call convocation.

I had coffee with a good friend last week. We're pretty close but I've honestly never opened up to him and shared any of these feelings I've had because basically the last time we hung out like that (almost two and a half years ago from now), I had a major crush on him :P But we've become good friends and all that foolish nervousness is long gone from my head. I did manage to open up to him about how I was feeling about my current situation in life, where I wanted to go, and some of the struggles I was facing currently. He's a bit older than me, so I did take his advice to heart and really think about what he was trying to get through to me. He said, "_______, it's your life. You have one opportunity to do what you want and that is it. Do you really want to live your life around pleasing the needs of others if you are not happy yourself?" He is so right because that's exactly what I've been doing. Just cruising along, going along with what everyone else expected me to do, what everyone else was doing. Not really thinking about the consequences, really. I mean, don't get me wrong. I consider myself to be a relatively intelligent person who makes relatively intelligent decisions. But I could be living my life completely different. I could be 110% happier.

I find myself living this way at home with my mom, with my boyfriend, with some of my nursing friends. I know it's no one's fault but my own. But I just need to learn to stand up for myself sometimes. I know it will make me a whole lot more confident. And confidence is what gets you far in life. You can only make change happen if you truly believe you have the power to do it.

There are so many things I want to do in life. To name a few:

1. Learn the piano
2. Improve my French
3. Attempt to learn another language (Russian and/or Spanish)
4. Visit the Holy Lands
5. Do a Eurotrip
6. Eventually get my Master's in something (I was thinking of Speech and Language Pathology)
7. Get married
8. Have / adopt kids
9. Go on a missions trip
10. Go to bible college (NOT to become a pastor, but to expand on my own biblical knowledge)
11. Work as a street outreach mental health nurse at some point(Hello, Vancouver!)

That's all I can think of right now.

I find number 11 really pulling at my heart strings right about now. I will explain later. Right now, I'm going to bed and preparing for my first day of driving school. One thing crossed off my bucket list!

Wish me luck! =)

Semester's Almost Over

Thank God for that!

This has been the fastest semester in my opinion. I also think this is the best semester for me, academically, but we'll see when I get my final marks back, haha.

I know I haven't done a fashion / outfit blog in a long long time, but it's simply because I have been superrrrr busy. As soon as I get a chance (which could be as early as next Friday), I am doing one.

It won't be long now, and Christmas will be here! So hard to believe. I feel it was only yesterday I was celebrating New Year's. Days simply seem to have flown by ever so quick in 2010. I guess you just have to make the most of it while you can.

I ordered a nice early Christmas gift of online shopping for me, which is due to arrive very shortly. I think I spend about 200 dollars between American Apparel, Forever 21, and WeLoveColors. I'm still looking for some short (mid-calf length), flat, white lace up boots. I think they look so elegant, and of course vintage.




I'm really loving the old school girl look. Knee socks, either oxford or short lace up boots, cardigans, blouses, pressed pants, blazers, belted dresses...




I really hope I feel better soon. All semester long I've been having what they thought was kidney infections, is now cystitis for some idiopathic reason. I had to go get blood work done and the doctor said depending on my results, I may need to have an ultrasound or MRI done. It's been very debilitating. I am always sick to my stomach and I can't eat or drink certain foods anymore, because it irritates my bladder and makes me nauseous with pain.

I can't drink wine (any alcohol what-so-ever), pop, spicy foods, juice (too acidic), and even berries.

I don't like this too much :(

A few things...

So, I am going to have a very busy next few days.
I am currently working on a 10 page paper due one week from yesterday.
Also, I have to prepare to teach a seminar to my class on Spirituality in Mental Health. On top of that, I have a mental health exam one week from this upcomming Wednesday. They should have never called it Midterm "Break". Honestly, what kind of break is this??
I don't think I've actually HAD a "break" since my second year of university, while I was still in general studies.

I also had a semi-break in my winter semester of second year. But basically that whole semester was a break for me.

I am looking forward to Halloween so much. Matthew and I were supposed to have a party at his place, but it's not going down now because his roomate had a party and almost burned the place down last weekend. So, Matt had to put his foot down and basically say, no parties. Not sure where we are going now, or what we're doing, as long as it's fun and Halloween-ish.

I have to start making my costume prettttyy soon.



haha :)

So, I still have not been to the new American Apparel yet here in town. Am I crazy.? I'm pretty sure I'm going to ask for a big dirty gift certificate from there for Christmas, because I honest to goodness LOVE that store. So much retro inspiration.

Speaking of retro, I'm convincing the nursing society to have a neon 80's mixer after exams. I think it's going ahead, and I think I might scream. Just a bittt *cough* alot.



I would so do this.



Ohhh HAAAAAYYY!

I would be in my Glee.

Speaking of Glee. I am an episode behind. Gotta watch that before Tuesday!!

So, I have not dressed yet, therefore, I do not have an outfit to show off for today. However, I do have my outfit from yesterday. It reminds me of the time I played Mimi in the musical "Rent". Ahh, nostalgia :)



Awww, me and Ange'

Well, yes, my outfit from yesterday was a little more "hard core" than my usual style. But I received lots of compliments.





Jacket: Sirens
Green Top: Winners
Necklace: Smart Set
Jeggings: Sirens

I also paired it up with my lovely jazz flats and this makeup I got from Faces Cosmetics in Toronto:




Loves fashion, I do!

Okay, back to academia-land I go.
Ciao
xoxo

Bonjour!

Hello Everyone

So the past few days I have been super busy studying for a pediatrics exam which I had today. I studied immensely, but I studied the wrong way, if that makes sense without going into details. I don't know what to make of it. It was a trickster.

Oh well, it certainly gave me the wake up call telling me I have to cut the slack and get down to business. I haven't done much since before last week when I started studying. The first weekend of school, I went out to a mixer. The second weekend of school, I went to my cousin's weekend. Only the past two weekend have I actually tried to make a decent effort in doing school stuff.

Anywhoo, 'nuff about school because it depresses me. I missed the last episode of Glee and a Disney movie night at Grant's last night because I had to freakin' study.

Sooooooooo

What Am I wearing today, right?
That's right!
I am wearing a very Parisan, artist-inspired outfit.
It's what I call one of my study outfits.

Very relaxed and comfortable.








Sweater: Sirens
Striped Tee: Gift (from Bluenotes)
Scarf: Gift (Matty got it in Poland!)
Jeans: Brody brand fr. Bootlegger
MJ Flats: Spring

Loveee.

The sweater-weather has officially started! :)

There will be more sweater-incorperated outfits in the future.

Now, off to clean my room and write a paper, I go!

Stamp once for Britney, and twice for Beyonce..

I tried studying pediatrics. Failed attempt. I don't know why I am unable to retain any information. This semester is brutal for the work load, but it's sooo boring. I need to keep on my toes. I'd rather be complaining now about how it's boring rather than complaining about pulling an all-nighter for an exam.

So, outfit of the day:




Romper: Winner's
Flyaway: Envy
Tights: Icing by Claire's
Earrings: Icing by Claire's
Scarf: Urban Planet
Short boots: Sirens (in Niagara Falls)
Purse: H&M

So, I am rediculous I know, but I have my New Year's Eve outfit picked ALREADY.
I really want to order this dress online from Gojane.com. Everything there is really good quality, really trendy, and uber cheap. So worth while. It's best to order things with a group of girls so shipping costs are alot cheaper.

Here she is:

I really want an emerald dress this year. With red pumps :)
So inspired by the Wizard of Oz / Wicked / The Wiz. This has to be done!







Only 50 dolla' roos plus shipping. GUURRRRRRRRRRRLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!

Yup, I like it very much.

These are red pumps I already own which I bought last Christmas:



And I was thinking, my, wouldn't that just look lovely now with a pair of red and green earrings. And I just happened to glance at my tangled mess of earrings. Low and behold, I found a perfect pair of red and green beaded hoops :)




Excited!!

I'm thinking a deep emerald smokey eye and red, red lips. Sexy sexy.
I got myself some inspiration makeup looks too:






I still have to get through this semester first. And Halloween. Gotta
get on that.

Okay, I'm out for the night.

Peace in the middle East <3